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The aching desire to be spanked is a mystery that isseemingly impenetrable to both understanding and explication.It isn't, though. At least, it (finally) is no longer so for me.Such enlightenment has been difficult, certainly; I puzzled over myattraction to being spanked, off and on, for months, if not years,until, in writing the last installment of my "First Timer" series("First Timer: The Aftermath"), I confronted this question head-on, inthe very first paragraphs:Gary had taken his clothes off in front of another man. He'd allowedanother man to spank him with his hand, to paddle him, and to beat hisass with two belts. He'd let another man turn his ass from pink to redto purple. He'd drunk another man's piss. He'd sucked another man's cockand swallowed his ejaculate. He'd allowed himself to be reduced totears, humiliated beyond belief, and physically and emotionally abused.Why? What had possessed him to acquiesce to such maltreatment? Moreimportantly, what was the matter with him. It felt like he was trying to detach my breasts from my chest until the bra gave and slipped over them. He pulled it up over my head and tossed it across the room."From now on, you don't wear bras or panties in my house. Maggie will take you shopping tomorrow to get you some skirts to wear." He pushed me down on to the bed on my back. "You can wear whatever the fuck you want to school and outside the house but in this house, the rule is no underwear and women always wear skirts."He climbed on top of me, and sat on my thighs. When I tried to hit him, to knock him off, he grabbed my wrists and pinned them both above my head using only one hand. Using my own tee shirt, he tied my wrists together. It didn't dawn on me at the time that this isn't easy to tie someone's hands with a tee shirt, but he did it expertly and quickly. He had obviously done it before many times.With my wrists tied, he used one hand to pin me to the bed while he crawled off and knelt beside me. "Go ahead and scream.
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